Muslim Psychology

Assalamu alaykaum

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For those who are interested I have started a new blog which will be more active soon Inshallah, it is called Muslim Psychology and will be touching on issues of the current climate with reference to psychology with a Muslimahs view point...

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To view the blog click on to my profile and there is a link at the bottom, or go to 'other blogs'

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Wassalam

The Hijaab – The Mark of Faithfulness

The Hijaab – The Mark of Faithfulness

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Faten Elayoubi

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British politician Jack Straw recently commented that he thought the hijaab was "a visible statement of separation and difference", whilst Prime Minister Tony Blair backed his comments. Instead of concentrating on trying to bridge the gaps between the community, a minority are dividing it even more. As a Muslim woman who wears the hijaab I feel that it is the people who are speaking out against the hijaab who are separating us from the rest of society. I feel that they do not truly understand the reasons behind why we choose to wear it; hence you will find them speaking without wisdom.

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Our lives as Muslims center on trying to please our Lord through following His commandments. We believe that He is the One who knows what is best for His creation for He is the All-Knowing, the All-Wise. He explains to us through His revelation that He created mankind and jinn (creation made of smokeless fire) only to worship Him. One of the commandments brought down by Allaah is for both men and women to be modest.

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Lo! men who surrender unto Allah, and women who surrender, and men who believe and women who believe, and men who obey and women who obey, and men who speak the truth and women who speak the truth, and men who persevere (in righteousness) and women who persevere, and men who are humble and women who are humble, and men who give alms and women who give alms, and men who fast and women who fast, and men who guard their modesty and women who guard (their modesty), and men who remember Allah much and women who remember Allah hath prepared for them forgiveness and a vast reward. Al-Qur'aan, 33:35

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One of the ways that both men and women have been commanded to be modest, is to dress in an appropriate manner. For women this includes wearing the hijaab, or as many know it, the headscarf.

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And tell the believing women to lower their gaze and be modest, and to display of their adornment only that which is apparent, and to draw their veils over their bosoms, and not to reveal their adornment save to their own husbands or fathers or husbands fathers, or their sons or their husbands' sons, or their brothers or their brothers' sons or sisters sons, or their women, or their slaves, or male attendants who lack vigour, or children who know naught of women' s nakedness. And let them not stamp their feet so as to reveal what they hide of their adornment. And turn unto Allah together, O believers, in order that ye may succeed. Al-Qur'aan 24:31

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O Prophet! Tell thy wives and thy daughters and the women of the believers to draw their cloaks close round them (when they go abroad). That will be better, that so they may be recognized and not annoyed. Allah is ever Forgiving, Merciful. Al-Qur'aan 33:59

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The hijaab is a protection against abuse and temptation from the outside world. It protects a woman from the prying eyes of strangers. The hijaab forces people to judge her based on her personality and the way she carries herself as a woman, instead of judging her based on her looks, the way she is dressed, or what brand of clothing she is wearing. She is a woman who looks after herself, keeps her beauty hidden to everyone except those whom Allaah has made an exception to and carries herself with dignity lessening the chances of someone annoying her, as the ayah itself states. In his tafsir (explanation) of the Qur'aan, Ibn Kathir interprets the ayah:

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"…that so they may be recognised and not annoyed" Al-Qur'aan 33:59

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to mean "That if they do that (i.e. draw their cloaks around them); it will be known that they are free, and that they are not servants or whores."

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Ibn Kathir also explains the ayah:

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"And tell the believing women to lower their gaze and be modest, and to display of their adornment only that which is apparent, and to draw their veils over their bosoms…" Al-Qur'aan 24:31

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to signify that "This is a command from Allah to the believing women, and jealousy on His part over the wives of His believing servants. It is also to distinguish the believing women from the women of the Jahiliyyah (ignorance) and the deeds of the pagan women."

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So from this we can see that a woman in hijaab is recognised as a Muslim woman, a woman who respects herself and the people around her, and this in turn demands respect to be shown to her.

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In conclusion, a woman who wears the hijaab, including the one who chooses to include the face veil as part of her dress code, is different. She is different to a woman who chooses to show off her beauty to the rest of the world, and she should not feel pressured into doing something she is not comfortable with. A woman in hijaab does not separate herself from the outside world as a whole; instead she separates herself from the filth that one can come across in this world; she moves away from the things that may harm her and brings herself closer to her Lord. She allows the hijaab to be a cover between her and the corruption that may lie ahead of her.

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A time to act!

Assalamu alaykaum

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The picture appeared in the pictures of the year list. It got me thinking, about all sorts... above all looking at the picture it kinda confused me as well as humoured me somewhat. Well they do say that a picture speaks a thousand words, this case is no different. Firstly the fact that a man is taking pictured of niqabis and also the stark contrast to the strangeness of the forefront and the background. It is two worlds colliding, they do not fit. This thought lead me to thinking about Islam and the west, the clash of ideologies?... hmm maybe a topic for another time, and another blog space!

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With all the focus on Muslims and the most recent debate on the niqab, I wondered what could possibly come out of such a discussion. The head of Britain's race relations watchdog, Trevor Phillips, believes that the debate 'could trigger race riots'. He warned that "this time the conflict could be much worse", comparing to previous riots such as the ones in North England 5 years ago. Not surprisingly his comments were backed by the Tories, who have been at the forefront of the beating down the Muslim bandwagon. However it is not just the politicians who are getting involved, Muslims from all parts of society are ready to condemn, command and apologise, things that we so often run to do.

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What started as a remark by Straw who asked a few women to remove their veils during his constituency surgeries, has in the word of Phillip is now becoming dangerously polarised, and "seems to have turned into something really quite ugly". Yes I agree, it has turned very ugly. But Alhamdulilah it has taken something like this to mobilise sisters with niqab, Mashallah as a result of the ugly debate we have seen, or more accurately heard, sisters coming onto the radio stations being extremely articulate when they defend their choice of wearing the niqab. They have responded not violently but articulately... now this is what I call jihad!

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They say then pen is mightier then the sword, but given the right setting, the tongue isn't too bad either!

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Now my call and the call of many is for sisters to be more active, we have no one to defend us, we cannot wait for others to fight our battles, when it is us who are in the firing line, we must stand tall, as we too shout and proclaim La illaha illala! There is no God but Allah!

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Sisters there is a time to be quiet and a time to defend, what time do you think it is now, a time to be quiet or a time to defend?

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wassalam

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Don't forget the ummah!

we tried, but never do we give up!

MPs Stick By Fast-Track Extraditions

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25/10/2006

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By Greg Hurst, Political Correspondent

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THE Government has blocked plans to protect Britons from “fast track” extradition to the United States, accusing critics of the extradition laws of scare-mongering.

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A predicted rebellion by Labour MPs failed to materialise as some government backbenchers balked yesterday at changing extradition rules at the behest of “rich bankers” such as the NatWest Three.

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Ministers dismissed claims that defendants extradited to the US would not face a fair trial and appealed to MPs to put the interests of victims first.

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Joan Ryan, a Home Office Minister, told the Commons: “If these citizens stand accused of a serious crime, we should facilitate justice — and that is what this treaty is about.”

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The proposed amendments to the Police and Justice Bill, which were introduced by the Opposition and backed by the Liberal Democrats, were defeated by 320 votes to 263, a government majority of 57. Among those who voted against the Government were the former Labour ministers Keith Vaz and Frank Field. Clare Short, who resigned the Labour whip last week, also voted with the opposition. Under the amendments the US authorities would need to submit more evidence to extradite Britons, and judges could insist that trials were heard in Britain.

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Tory MPs said yesterday that the Anglo-American extradition treaty, signed in 2003, was imbalanced. They said that British authorities had to produce prima facie evidence showing “probable cause” to extradite an American, but the US had only to show that allegations had been made.

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However, Ms Ryan told MPs that there was “rough parity” in the tests. She said that the requirement on the US was similar to the test of “reasonable suspicion”. Dismissing claims that extradited Britons would not get a fair trial in the US, Ms Ryan said that America was a “trusted partner with a legal system in a democracy of very long standing with whom we have had relations for over 100 years”.

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She said that Lord Falconer of Thoroton, the Lord Chancellor, and John Reid, the Home Secretary, were discussing plans with Alberto Gonzales, the US Attorney-General, to improve information sharing between prosecutors in cases spanning both countries. Some Labour MPs demonstrated their hostility to changing extradition laws to help defendants such as the NatWest Three, the investment bankers awaiting trial for fraud charges in Texas. John Redwood, Tory MP for Wokingham, faced cat-calls from Labour MPs when he said that the Tories had been told that the extradition treaty was needed to fight terrorism, not “white-collar crime”. He asked why such defendants should be taken from their families when they were unlikely to flee. In response to some barracking from the government benches, he said: “They are your constituents as well as ours.” Ms Ryan replied: “Fraud is not entitled to some kind of exemption. There is no such thing as a victimless crime.”

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Later, Andrew Dismore, Labour MP for Hendon, said that there were people who faced trial in the US who should be tried in Britain. However, those who were most as risk were defendants from minority communities, “not rich bankers”.

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SOURCE: The Times http://www.cageprisoners.com/articles.php?id=17193

Eid Mubarak!

Assalamu alaykaum

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'tis Eid.. if you havent already relised :D....

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Seems like yesturaday that we were welcoming our dear friend Ramadan, how the days have flown by. “O son of Aadam you are but a few days, whenever a day has gone part of you hasgone too” -Hassan al Basree

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Our hearts now yearn for its return, but we are yet to find out if our efforts have been accepted. Farewell dear Ramadan Taqabbala Allaahu Minna wa Minkum. May Allaah accept it from you and us, aameen.

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May Allah purify us, guide us, accept our efforts during Ramadan, protect us from the evils of oursleves and of sShaytaan and shower us with His mercy and love.

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Have a nice day everyone, smile, be happy, enjoy the company of your friends and family, re connect broken ties of kinship.. and dont eat too much ;)

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and in the words of one text I got... "HOPE YOU HAVE A BOOMBASTIC DAY!..." :D

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Keep me in you duas, and please forgive me if I have ever hurt, offended or cause you harm, I love every Muslim for the sake of Allah. EID MUBARAK

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Dont forget the Ummah.

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wassalam

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Essence of Eid

Where Would I Be Without The Quran?

Salam people!

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Mashallah, my local Masjid finished the Quran in Taraveeh yesturday and did the end of Quran duah... Subhanllah, never have I been present at a more moving suplication, I am sure there was not a dry tear in the whole Masjid, which was the fullest Ive seen it since it opened.

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The Imaan was very emotional, making it all that much heart felt, the sisters of course were also very emotional.

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I cant do it justice but these are some glimses of the duah:

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"Ya Allah if our names are written on the gates of hell fire, Ya Allah if our names are written on the gates of hell, Ya Allah wipe them off.. wipe it off, and write our names on the gates of Jannah, Ya Allah."

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"Ya Allah let the Quran intercede on the day of judgment, Ya Allah let us have the Quran in the grave with us, let the Quran keep us company in our graves. Let us see Jannah in our graves"

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"Ya Allah, let the Quran speak on behalf of us on the day of judment, not against us, let the Quran speak on behalf of us on the day of judment."

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"Ya Allah on the day when when people will be running from eachother, women will drop their loads, when the sun will be close to our heads, when people will be grabing hasanaat good deeds from others, Ya Allah"

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"Ya Allah make us of the first 70,000 to enter Jannah, crosing the bridge swiftly"

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"Ya Allah, let us be amongst the ones your rasool picks out and intercedes on our behalf"

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"Ya Allah make us be amonght the Prophet Adam alayhi salam, Ibrahem alayhi salam, Musa alayhi salam, Ya Allah let us be among Prophet Muhammad salalahi wa alayhi wa salam, Let us be able to recognise him and he recognises us as part of his Ummah."

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"Ya Allah let us be distinguished as part of your Ummah, by the whiteness of our faces, the whiteness of our hands, the whiteness of our arms"

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"Ya Allah forgive us, Ya Allah forgive us, Ya Allah forgive us, Ya Allah forgive us. Ya Gafoor, Ya Raheem."

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I want to share this poem with you regarding the glorious Quran...

Remember me in your duas

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Where Would I Be Without The Quran?

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A Poem By Babar Ahmad

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Date: 21-Sep-2004

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By British Political Prisoner Babar Ahmad MX5383

13th September 2004

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Where would I be without the Quran?

Would I be guided? Would I be strong?

Would I be protected from evil and wrong?

Would I hear my Creator’s Words?

Would I hear Him describe the birds?

Would I know the stories of the old?

Would I realise their worth in gold?

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Where would I be without the Quran?

Would I find safety when others fear?

Would I find peace whilst sitting here?

Would I be happy when others are sad?

Would I be protected from going mad?

Would I be patient when things get tough?

Would I be firm when the seas are rough?

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Where would I be without the Quran?

Would I get to know the One above?

Would I increase for him my love?

Would I be aware of the Day to come?

Would I value what is worthless to some?

Would I be able to sleep at night?

Would I be able to see with His light?

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Where would I be without the Quran?

Would I have examples to follow?

Would I rejoice when others are in sorrow?

Would I have fear of the Burning Fire?

Would I be at the bottom of the sea,

And have hope, that one day, my Lord will release me?

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www.cageprisoners.com

Recitation that touches your heart

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Dead Hearts

Dead Hearts

Imaam ibn al-Qayyim al-Jawziyyah rahimahullaah

Taken from Al Jumuah, Vol 8 Issue 4

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While thousands of Muslims are killed all over the world, and while tens of thousands are imprisoned and tortured for calling to the path of Allah and for enjoining the good and forbidding the evil, most Muslims remain remarkably silent and have no worry except for the material things of life. Their hearts have been filled with the love of this life and the forgetfulness of the Hereafter.

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Allah says in the Qur'an: "You will indeed find them, of all people, most greedy of life, even more than those who do not believe in Resurrection. Each one of them wishes he could be given a life of a thousand years. But the grant of such life will not save him even a little from due punishment. For Allah sees well all that they do." (Al Baqarah, 2:96)

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Many Muslims today have become so much attached to their life that their desire is to dwell among their family, house, money and commerce. They have forgotten that matters of the Hereafter should come before matters of this life and that we must strive to follow the orders of Allah, not just those we find easy and convenient to follow. Some Muslims today claim that it is better to perform extra prayers and extra fasting rather than enjoin the good and forbid the evil or defend the lives of weak Muslims. Such people would even blame the Muslims who strive to perform these obligations.

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This is what Ibn al-Qayyim had to say about such people: ''The Shaitan has misled most people by beautifying for them the performance of certain voluntary acts of worship such as voluntary prayers and voluntary fasting while neglecting other obligatory acts of worship such as enjoining the good and eradicating the evil, to the extent that they do not even make the intention of performing them whenever they are able to. Such people are considered by the scholars to be on the bottom of the scale of religion: For the essence of our religion is to perform what Allah ordered us to do. The one who does not perform his obligations is actually worse than the one who performs sins. Anyone having some knowledge about the revelation of Allah, the guidance of the Prophet, sallallahu alayhe wa sallam, and the life of the companions would conclude that those who are pointed at today as the most pious people are in fact the least pious. Indeed, what kind of piety is there in a person who witnesses Allah's sanctities being violated, his religion abandoned, the Sunnah of His Messenger shunned, and yet remains still with a cold heart and a shut mouth' Such a person is like a dumb Shaitan! In the same way the one who talks falsehood is a speaking Shaitan. Isn't the misfortune of Islam due only to those who whenever their life and food are secure, would not care about what happens to the religion? The best among them would offer a sorry face. But if they were challenged in one of the things their heart is attached to like their money, they would spare no efforts to get it back. These people, besides deserving the anger of Allah, are afflicted with the greatest calamity without even knowing it: They have a dead heart. Indeed the more alive a person's heart is, the stronger its anger for the sake of Allah and the more complete his support to Islam and Muslims."

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(A'alaam al-Muwaqqi'een, volume 2, page 176).

Advice From an Older Brother

Advice From an Older Brother

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From a lecture given at MIST Nationals 2006 by Abu Ammaar Yasir Qadhi

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Friday July 21st, 2006

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Transcribed and posted by brother Ibn al-Hyderabader

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“I would like to start by congratulating everyone for making it to the First MIST National Conference. You are the participants and are the future of this ummah. I would like to take this opportunity to give everyone some advice as an older brother. I too once was in your place and it doesn’t seem like it was too long ago. The realty is very soon you guys are going to take over the place of your parents and your community leaders very soon. Very soon you are going to move onto college. Very soon you are going to start working, and very soon you are going to get marred. Very soon you will have kids and before you know it you will be an uncle or auntie. God Forbid!

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Before I start my actual lecture I would like to tell you a little bit about my self. I grew up in a fairly religious family and my parents were religious or you can say practicing parents. I was the average Muslim kid growing up and knew very little about my religion. It wasn’t until I started attending the University of Houston when I realized how ignorant people actually were about the religion of Islam, and how ignorant I was about my own religion. I attended the University of Houston in the early 90s. It was here when the desire for knowledge increased in me. It was hearing some of these people talk about Islam and misrepresenting it which really made my desire increase. The desire increased in me to start studying my own religion increased again and again. I got very involved in the MSA at the University of Houston, I remember being extremely active. I even did many halaqas there for the MSA.

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I remember 15 years ago sitting here in this university listening to my professors giving lectures. It was in t his same university. I actually had a class in this same exact building and I remember it like it was yesterday. I remember some of the classes that I took here. I remember taking these classes and thinking to myself, how is this actually going to benefit me? How is knowing all this stuff about chemical engineering going to benefit me. I remember taking thermodynamics and thinking to myself, how is this ever going to make me a good person, how is this going to change me? I remember the first day of class when my professor walked in for thermodynamics class, and I remember exactly what he said. He said, “By the end of this class you will be able to calculate how long it will take an ice cube to melt in a cup of coffee!” I thought about it and said to myself, “SO WHAT??” How does knowing how long it takes an ice cube to melt in a cup of coffee this make me a good person? I had this desire to learn about my religion and went through college with this desire and graduated with a bachelor’s in Chemical Engineering.

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I even worked at DOW Chemicals for a year, which is the 2nd largest chemical company in the USA. BASF is the largest. I was assigned a project which many people before me couldn’t do and left the project without completing it. I was assigned to finish stage 1. I, alhamadulillah, managed to get to stage 3 within 3 months and was in the process of finishing it. My boss told me you are going to go places. Money was just pouring in and I could go into a store and actually pick what I wanted to get and there was nothing that was holding me back. For the first time in my life I was able to buy what I want with my own money, without worrying about anything.

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All this was not something that really satisfied me. I felt incomplete, and wanted more. I still had the desire to study my own religion. So after doing some research into the Islamic Universities, I decided to go to the University of Medina and they accepted me. I spent 10 years at the University of Medina. I did my Bachelor’s in Hadeeth and my Master’s in Theology or Aqeedah from the college of Da’wah. And currently I am doing my Ph.D. at Yale.

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Knowledge and Studying your Deen

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And I am here in front of you today and if I were to choose again I would go back and do the same thing and do religious studies. I cant even remember what courses I took when I was at UH. My main motivation for choosing to do Islamic studies was that I realized I needed to do something for the ummah. As we speak we have a crisis going through our ummah. We all know, we don’t need to talk more about it, it is all over the news and everything. I know some of you wont leave what you are doing and I dotn expect you to and I don’t want you to. This ummah needs the doctors, engineers, and lawyers. Not everyone in this ummah needs to be an ‘alim or scholar. And Allah definitely doesn’t ask everyone to be a scholar. If you are not going to be a scholar then you should at least know your religion. To me I was ashamed that I knew so much about physics, chemistry, and mathematics compared to what I knew about my religion.

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Our communities are in need of scholars though. We see it in our communities often, where we have an iman who is from another world practically and doesn’t understand what we are going through. It is true, they are from another world because ehtye haven’t grown up here. We need to stop importing imams because our communities cant respect them. We see it in our communities that these moulvis and maulanas give fatwa and people don’t respect them, and we cant blame the imams nor can we completely blame the community. There is a big gap between them, we need homegrown scholars and students of knowledge to bridge this gap.

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Like I said before not everyone here is going to be a scholar, and nobody expects everyone here to become one. The least everyone should do is learn your religion. Each and every one of you can read a book a month, its not that hard and it only requires you to make some time for it. All you need to do is cut back on some of the things we do. I know all of us have things that we can cut back on. I am not saying stop hanging around friends, or going to movies or what ever it is you do. All I am saying is cut back on some of the things to make time for learning your religion. Our elders came here for whatever reason they came here for, we are growing here, we understand the psychology of Americans but if we don’t have knowledge of religion how are we going to make them understand our religion. How are we going to make da’wah to them and call them to Islam? There is a need for homegrown scholars and fulfilling that need starts with you.

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How to study your religion?

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1.Study the Qur’an - If you can memorize US History and the 50 States in alphabetical order then surely you can read the book of Allah, you can understand what the book of Allah is saying. Make sure you pull the Qur’an down from that shelf for 10-15 minutes a day and read it. If you don’t read Arabic, then read the translation at least. The Qur’an is the most blessed thing to read there is so much baraka in it. It is so blessed; it is the Speech of Allah.

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2.Book of Hadeeth – The best statements were the statements of RasoolAllah (Sal Allahu Alayhi Wa Sallam). Riyadh As Saliheen is a very good book for everyone. Read at least one or two hadeeth a day. The book is written for the laymen and thus it is very easy to understand.

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3.Study basic theology. We all need to study a little bit of aqeedah. Each and every muslims needs to know what is the Islamic belief or creed. We need to know the difference between us and them. We need to know what is the difference between God and Father.

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4.Another very important area of Islam that we need to study is fiqh. Each and everyone of us needs to know how to worship Allah. How many of us can list the factors that break your wudoo. Forget the differences of opinion, just know at least one opinion from the madhabs what it is and hwo to do it. This is the least everyone should know.

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.Basic Laws of Islam that govern our everyday life or that determine our everyday decisions. As the Prophet (sal Allahu alayhi Wa Sallam) said, “Learning knowledge is obligatory on each and every Muslim” This the least we need to do and with everything else we do it isn’t that hard at all. Allah doesn’t require you to become a scholar, but atleast learn your religion a little bit, and this way you will learn to respect the imams and ulemaa. And form personal experience let this knowledge come to you form someone who is elder but not too old.

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Parents

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Besides studying your deen, the other point I wanted to stress on was respecting your elders, specially your parents. I know this has been stressed a lot in your lives probably and you probably heard this more than you can count. We have heard all of the ayaat and hadeeth about respecting our parents many times. But do we actually do it? Allah mentions treating your parents with respect right after respecting Allah and Allah also tells us not to even say uff to them. Do you know what uff is in Arabic. In classical Arabic it was used for the dirt under our nails. This is the most trivial and miniscule thing you can think of and that is what uff is meant to represent. Later on the Arabs started to refer to the slightest expression of irritation as uff. This is what we aren’t supposed to tell our parents or feel this way with them. I know I said I wasn’t going to mention the ayaat and hadeeth about respecting your parents but Allah says, “If your parents force you to do shirk, drag you to worship an idol, don’t listen to them, but treat them with respect”. This is talking about the greatest sin a person could commit, this is the one unforgivable sin and Allah says if your parents try to make you do this then still don’t obey them but treat them with respect. If your parents are so evil to make you do shirk and you still have to treat them with respect then what about other things. I can say we all don’t treat our parents the way we are supposed to. We really fall short of treating your parents properly because it is true, we don’t.

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One thing that we as men might lack is that we don’t have the tenderness and emotion that we need to. We always want to be the tough people and the ones in charge. We don’t have the love that women have. You will think you love your wife a lot and you have attained the height of love. You think that there could not be a love for a human being that is higher than the love that you have for your spouse. This is what you think but a day will some when you will have a kid, and when you hold your child you will realize what the kind of love you are experiencing which never experienced before. You will realize the actual love that your parents felt when they held you, when you were first born. For the first time in your life you are ready to sacrifice anything to satisfy your child. This is called pure love, you love them just because you want to love them and there is no other reason for this love.

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Then it will hit you that this kid that you are holding is going to grow up under your care. You are going to be providing for this child’s upbringing for the rest of your life. You will see this child grow up right in front of you. Only then you are going to realize the kind of sacrifice your parents made to raise you. You are now in a position that your parents were once in, raising your own child. And then it will hit you again. You will remember the way you treated your parents and realize that this kid will grow up and treat you the way you treated your parents. The first time I realized this I was literally crying, because I realized that the kid that I will raise will one day talk back to me the way I talked back to my parents. This right here hits home, this shows you how your actions today will affect you in the future. Its still not too late for you to change, you still have some time before your parents pass away. You know what you did to your parents, and you should expect your children to treat you the same way you treated your parents.

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You might be frustrated with the rules and regulations your parents put on you and you think that you are an adult and they need to treat you like an adult. The truth is you are not an adult. You will become an adult when you go to sleep thinking about how you are going to pay rent or worrying about it. I myself thought I was able to live alone, I didn’t even know how much rent was. You will become an adult when you start worrying about how much rent cost and how you are going to pay for it, and you are going to calculate how you are going to pay for your groceries and utilities. You don’t really care about money now, your parents are filthy rich, and if you need anything all you need to do is ask your parents.

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You might look at your parents now and say that they are so backward and they are form another world, another time. It might be true because they are from another world and they think differently. They might not know how the world around you works but 30 years down the line, your kids are going to know a new generation. Your kids are going to look at you the same way you look at your parents. Your kids are going to look at you like a backward people you came from another time and it will be true because you will be from another time.

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And I am pretty sure for most of you your dad is the last person that you would go for advice or talk to about some issue that you are having. My dad used to be the last person I would talk to. Now he is the first. Just because your dad speaks in an accent doesn’t mean he doesn’t know what going on, he might not know exactly what’s going on but he does have experience. You will realize this later on in your life that your dad or mom are people that you should turn to for advice.

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You might not look at how you treat your parents as something that is big but you won’t be able to take back what you did to your parents. Your parents will love you the way no one else will love you. The love a parent gives to his offspring is something that is not found in anyone else. When your parents die, you will never be able to make up any hardship, any tears, any anger, any frustration you caused them. Even if you caused them some kind of irritation or sadness because of a face you made, you will not be able to take that back when they die. If you are angry then shut your mouth and just walk away. There is nothing wrong with bottling up your anger, it might cause you some pain now but in the long run it will save you from other kinds of harm. Allah said even if they force you on an idol you have to respect them, what about an 8 o clock curfew. At a stage in your life you will have to get out and be a real man or woman, this is not the time. A time will come but the time is not now.

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These are the best times of your life; you don’t realize it until you lose it. No one will love you the way your mother and father will love you, while you are experiencing that love look at it with respect and love and not suffocation because it is not. They might put these rules on you, okay you are going to get angry, but seal your lips don’t say anything and don’t even show anything on your face because once you say something you cant take it back. I miss being a kid, once you get to my age everyone wants to be a kid again, right now enjoy it. Everyone should feel that my parents are the best parents in the world.

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Maturity

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The third point that I wanted to stress was maturity. When your parents see that you are a mature respectful adult, they might actually slack off a little bit and let you do more things that you want to do, the way you want to do it.

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There is a problem with America. There is this age or boundary that they call adolescence. In Islam there is no intermediate stage, as soon as you hit puberty you are a full adult. The problem comes when we are given these contradictory ideas from here where you are not a child nor you are an adult. In the shareeah it has been laid down straight, you are a full adult once you hit puberty.

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If you feel that you are adults then start acting like adults. See what’s actually going around in the world and keep up with it. Like I said earlier, you are going to one day take charge after the adults go away. You need to know what is going on and find ways to improve the condition of the ummah around you or at least your self your family and community. There is a certain respect that comes with being a Muslim. You should see that you are different and that you are someone that actually cares. Be a mature adult and try to figure out the reason you are on this earth and plan accordingly. There is truly a reason for you to be a person on this earth, and not only that but a Muslim on this earth.

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And lastly to wrap up you are in a competition, it doesn’t matter who is going to win and lose. The main benefit for being here is that you are going to get to know other Muslims, and you are going to be with them praying on time, you are going to learn something about the religion and in the process better yourself. So while you are here act like you are mature and try to behave yourself. One incident can ruin the conference name. I don’t have to name other conferences, we all know about them, that due to laxness on their part the entire conference has a bad reputation. Make sure you observe the proper etiquette when you deal with other people and specially deal with other genders. I guarantee you there dozens of parents out there that didn’t want their kids out here at this conference because of the gender interactions that happen at places of gathering. I guarantee you right now your parents are worried about what you are doing.

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InshaAllah if everyone behaves themselves and observes the proper etiquette then MIST will be known as a place that can handle itself properly. It will be trusted by the parents. They will see that oh look its MIST we can trust them with our kids. And if we are able to maintain this reputation, the MIST Conference will grow bigger and bigger every year. If we have 3 or 4 regions being represented this year, we will have the double the following year, and more the next year. MIST can be known as a beacon of light for the west as a symbol of Islam in the high schools.”

The Best of Times

The Best of Times

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Moazzam Begg

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Cageprisoners.com

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I first read the Dickens’ classic, Bleak House, in solitary confinement, Camp Echo. The concentric part of this story is based on the fictitious – though accurately representative – and never-ending case of Jarndyce vs Jarndyce which ultimately consumes and destroys the lives of it’s central characters, rather like the Supreme court decisions relating to the Guantánamo detainees. But it was the first sentence of this book, which reads, ‘It was the best of times, it was the worst of times,’ that captured my imagination back then. That is precisely how I would have described the noble months of Ramadhan spent in US custody.

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It was the night before the festival of Eid ul-Adha that I was sent from Pakistani custody into US custody at Kandahar. After the brutal initiation of being processed like an animal and locked in a cage made of razor wire, I couldn’t believe my ears when a visitor from the Red Cross was wandering around the cells, with an army escort, handing out small pieces of meat and cold bread to detainees, uttering the words, ‘Eid Mubarak’.

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That was the first Eid my family ever spent without me. Another five (both Eids of al-Adha and al-Fitr) were to pass before I saw them again. For most people in Guantánamo, it is approaching ten of these blessed days over a period of five years, dwelling in cages. And still they pray for deliverance.

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However, the worst Ramadan I’ve ever had in my life was not in Guantánamo; that happened in Bagram – the US detention facility in Afghanistan. This was a place where already torture, humiliation and degradation of detainees regularly occurred. We were not allowed to talk, we were not allowed to walk or exercise without permission. We were not given access to natural light–or dark. We had to guess prayer times and were not allowed to pray in jama’ah (congregation), call the athaan or recite the Quran out loud. I had to make tayyamum (dry ablution) for a year and had forgotten how to make wudhu correctly by the time I arrived in Guantánamo, since water could only be used to drink, but not for wudhu (ablution). Anyone failing to comply with these rules was unceremoniously dragged to the front of the cell, their wrists shackled to the top of the cage and a black hood placed over the head. It happened to us all – sometimes for hours on end.

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When Ramadhan came I was already dreading it. I think we were all dreading it. There were no hot meals or drinks for us in Bagram. Fresh vegetables were a luxury we were not afforded. Fresh fruit was a rarity. There was none of the food we all so lovingly prepare and indulgingly consume during this month of abstention in our homes. There were no snacks between meals or keeping food until later: everything had to be handed back within 15 minutes – eaten or not. The meals were small pre-packed sachets, the types used for campers, and, sometimes, a mouldy piece of Afghan bread thrown in for good measure.

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There was no Taraweeh prayer, no Eid prayer. In fact there was no Jumu’ah (Friday congregational prayer). The detainees in Bagram and Guantánamo shortened every prayer not only as a mercy from Allah, but as a refusal to accept any permanence of incarceration, even though that was–and continues to be–a looming reality. It was a defiant rejection of imprisonment without charge or trial – a fact unnoticed and quite irrelevant to our captors.

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As if to punish us for the very arrival of Ramadhan we were given only two meals: the suhoor (pre-dawn meal) and iftaar (sunset meal), the latter being given to us often four hours after sunset. On the day of Eid ul-Fitr we did not feast and make merry like most of the Muslim world. Instead we were made to fast from dawn to near midnight when we were finally given a food sachet. One of the guards, a young female to whom I used to speak often about Islam, history and literature was appalled by this and gave me some of her own food, at real risk to herself. It is a gesture I will never forget, but she was a rarity.

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That was the worst of times. But it wasn’t over. I spent the following Ramadhan alone, in solitary confinement. In truth, I hated the approach of this Ramadhan too. I knew the outlook was bleak. I had to imagine how my family were passing this month and the festival that followed. It is a month of blessing, extra prayer, sharing, inviting others to meals; a month of anticipating celebrations with family and friends who, for me and many others, were both only a distant memory by then. I thought of all the Islamic rulings about fasting and how it all seemed rather immaterial here. In fact I could have not fasted, since I was shortening my prayer – hence I had the status of a traveller, albeit a coerced one. But I think fasting was a pronounced difference between us and them, and act of defiance too.

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The concept of abstaining completely from food as well as drink from dawn to dusk was as alien to most burger-eating, fries-munching, Budweiser-drinking yanks as American justice was for us. Even the practicing Christian soldiers, who often read the Bible in front of me, couldn’t comprehend that the fast of the Muslim was like the fast Prophets, not the fast of Lent during which some devotees choose to refrain from having mushrooms on their pizza as a personal sacrifice to the Almighty. I remember telling a guard that in fact he ‘fasted’ every day, although his timings were different: the break-fast meal every morning. He still didn’t get it.

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after the passing of this Ramadhan in seclusion, with no contact from another Muslim for close to two years, I was longing, praying and agitating that the next one will be spent in the company of Muslims – even one Muslim. My prayer was finally answered. And thus, my final Ramadhan and Eid were both spent in the company of the world’s most dangerous terrorists (according to Bush) and the world’s finest examples of patience and fortitude (according to me).

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Some guards ridiculed the athaan when the muezzin’s voice echoed around Guantánamo – particularly at sunset, when it clashed with the US national anthem that simultaneously rung out on loud speakers. What followed was a daily reminder to us all about our [soldiers and prisoners] purpose in life: one group – the one dressed in khaki–stopped in their tracks, stood in the direction of their flag, raised their right hands and saluted their object of their devotion: the US flag. The other group –the one dressed in orange – also stopped in their tracks, stood facing east and raised both their hands to salute their object of their devotion: the Unseen God and Lord of the Worlds.

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During the day, despite the intense tropical Caribbean heat, we recited and memorised the Quran, had debates on any subject from medieval African history to Hubble’s expanding universe theory; from the Islamic ruling on captives to the latest Western methods of capturing them. We exercised vigorously, many of us far surpassing the physical capabilities of the full time soldiers guarding us. Some of us controlled our anger and antipathy towards the guards during this month and offered smiles and kind words, when the opposite would have been expected. That too was an act of defiance.

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The greatest defiance, to me at least, was wishing each other ‘hanee-an maree-an’ (bon appetite) at iftaar. It was also the spontaneous breaking out into anasheed (Islamic songs) in Arabic, Urdu, Pashto, Farsi, Uighur, Turkish and yes, even English; it was the recitation of poetry and prose in verses that could not have been compiled anywhere on earth but Guantánamo – the prison of the enemy where captive Muslims brought the first ever call to prayer; it was the individual calls of as-salaamu ‘alaikum wa rahmat Ullahi wa barakaatuh ya Abdullah (May the peace, mercy and blessings of Allah be upon you, O servant of Allah) emanating from cell blocks with invisible faces – faces that showered us with concern, hope and love, even though we couldn’t see them.

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But there was an act of defiance even more potent. It was more powerful than throwing liquid cocktails at the soldiers, stronger than lashing out with shackled hands towards them or calling them himaar (donkey) or khanzeer (pig), even stronger than the hunger-strikes that nearly claimed the lives of many a brave man. It was the prayer. It was the du’aa (supplication) to Allah of the Imam reverberating, alone, amidst the chimes of razor wire rubbing against barbed wire impelled by a soft sea breeze. It was saying ‘Ameen’, in unison to a prayer we all wanted answered. It was the tears we all shed, in the knowledge that each of us had a reason to weep. It was the sadness that was almost sweet. It was our ultimate symbol of defiance. It was the best of times.

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Source: http://cageprisoners.com/articles.php?id=16951

Ramadan Mubarak.. but is it?

Assalamu Alaikum Wa Rahmatullahi Wa Barakatuhu.

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Inshallah, this reaches you in the best of health and eeman.

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We spend Ramadan with our family and break our fast with a variety of options, in fact we have so much choice, we can not decide what to eat but what about the brothers who have been detained... a personal account from a brother currently in Belmarsh clearly stating that they are given iftar two hours before (therefore cold) and the food is not that which is sufficient for a child let alone a grown man. The brothers are held in cells for up to twenty one hours a day and only allowed 1 hour recreational time, in which they have to shower, make calls etc. Ramadan is the hardest time for those brothers detained, many of which do not have contact with family and friends as they are shunned due to the 'by association' tag.

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This Ramadan, Inshallah with your help and support, I hope to send out Eid cards to all the brothers below in order to remind them that they are not forgotten and the ummah are still thinking of them.

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nshallah, if we all come together, we can ensure that all the brothers receive cards with an individual message rather then sending out one circular to all. If you are interested in helping me to achieve this, please email letting me know which brother or brothers you will send to (we are doing this fisabilillah but this is just so i can ensure we have everyone covered).

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Note: If you do not wish to write your name, you can Inshallah, sign it using your family name and if you do not wish to include your own address, then please use:

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SPT

PO Box 45798

SW16 4XS

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Please can you get back to me as soon as possible as the mail does not reach the brothers for weeks at a time and we Inshallah, want them to arrive before Eid (not two weeks later).

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Addresses & Detainee No:

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HMP Belmarsh Western Way Thamesmead London SE28 0EB

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Syed Talha Ahsan TA6044

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Tariq Al Daour NB9133

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Dhiren Barot NB5353

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Mohammad Bhatti MX5483

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Abdul Aziz Jalil NB5352

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Aabid Hussain Khan WW4708

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Omer Abdulrehman MX5484

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Muhammad Ramzi NB8285

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Mahmood NB4267

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Prisoner no. HJ4127

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Prisoner no. FF7095

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Prisoner no. HP9416

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Prisoner no. HP6742

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Prisoner no.HP8918

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Prisoner no.HP6676

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Prisoner no. NB 4670

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HMP Woodhill, Tattenhoe Street, Milton Keynes, Buckinghamshire, MK4 4DA

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Babar Ahmad MX5383

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Farid Hilali HP8485

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Qaser Shafi MX5481

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Nadeem Tarmohammed MX5480

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Haroon Rashid Aswat

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Zia ul-Haq MX5482

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HMP Long Lartin South Littleton Evesham Worcestershire WR11 8TZ

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Adel Bary CB9445 (facing extradition to US)

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Amar Makhlulif FF8180 (facing extradition to US)

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Detainee K, MX8762 (formerly under control orders)

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Detainee Q, MX8760 (formerly under control orders)

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Abu Qatada MX8756

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Prisoner MK, NB9773

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Detainee B (facing deportation) Broadmoor Luton Ward, Broadmoor Psychiatric Hospital, Crowthorne, Berkshire RG11 78G

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Prisoner MX8760 HMP Full Sutton: YORK, YO41 1PS (sender must enclose name & address for mail to be delivered to a prisoner )

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Farid Hilali HP8485 A2 - O11

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HMP WHITEMORE: Longhill Road March Cambs PE15 OPR

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Facing deportation / Currently bailed / House arrest

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Detainee G, MX8759 (formerly under control orders) c/o Birnberg Peirce & Partners 14 Inverness Street Camden Town London NW1 7HJ

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Detainee HH c/o Natalia Garcia Tyndallwoods Solicitors Windsor House Temple Row Birmingham B2 5TS

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Detainee NN c/o Natalia Garcia Tyndallwoods Solicitors Windsor House Temple Row Birmgham B2 5TS

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Detainee A, MX8754 (formerly under control orders) c/o Birnberg Peirce & Partners 14 Inverness Street Camden Town London NW1 7HJ

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Detainee H, MX8758 (formerly under control orders) c/o Birnberg Peirce & Partners 14 Inverness Street Camden Town London NW1 7HJ

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Detainee T,MX8755 c/o Natalia Garcia Tyndallwoods Solicitors Windsor House Temple Row Birmingham B2 5TS

. Mamdouh Abu Rideh c/o Daniel Guedalla Birnberg Peirce & Partners 14 Inverness Street Camden Town London NW1 7HJ

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Detainee ‘E’ (FF9416) c/o Daniel Guedalla Birnberg Peirce & Partners 14 Inverness Street Camden Town London NW1 7HJ

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Detainee P c/o Daniel Guedalla Birnberg Peirce and Partners 14 Inverness Street Camden Town London NW1 7HJ

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Detainee ‘X’ (electric house arrest & awaiting extradition to the US) c/o Daniel Guedalla Birnberg Peirce & Partners 14 Inverness Street Camden Town London NW1 7HJ

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Jazakallah khair for your time.

. Wasalaamualaikum Wa Rahmatullahi Wa Barakatuhu www.forthesakeofallah.blogspot.com

hhugs_2004@yahoo.co.uk

The Hardened Heart

Assalamu alaykaum

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The quote by Ibn ul Qayyim al Jawziyyah is from this article he wrote

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wassalam

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The Hardened Heart

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The slave is not afflicted with a punishment greater than the hardening of the heart and being distant from Allah for the Fire was created to melt the hardened heart. The most distant heart from Allah is the heart which is hardened. If the heart becomes hardened, the eye becomes dry.

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If four matters are exceeded in quantity, beyond what is necessary, the heart shall become hardened: Food, sleep, speech and sexual intercourse. A body afflicted by disease does not derive nourishment from food or water, similarly a heart diseased by desire does not benefit from admonishment or exhortation.

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Whosoever desires to purify his heart, then let him prefer Allah to his desires.

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The heart which is clinging to its desires is veiled from Allah, commensurate to the degree that it is attached to them. The hearts are the vessels of Allah upon His earth, hence the most beloved of them to Him, are the ones most compassionate, pure and resistant to deviation.

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They (the transgressors) preoccupied their hearts [in the pursuance] of the Dunya, would that they preoccupied them with Allah and the Hereafter, then surely they would have reflected upon the intended meaning of His poignant Words and Verses. Their hearts would have returned to their masters with a wisdom, marvelously curious and [in possession] of the rarest of precious gems.

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If the heart is nourished with remembrance, its thirst quenched with contemplation and cleansed from corruption, it shall witness remarkable and wondrous matters, inspiring wisdom.

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Not every individual is endowed with knowledge and wisdom, and assumes its character is from amongst its people. Rather the People of Knowledge and Wisdom are those who infused life into their hearts by slaying their desires. As for the one who slew his heart and vitalized his desires, then knowledge and wisdom are naked upon his tongue.

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The destruction of the heart occurs by security [in this Dunya] and negligence, its fortification occurs by fear and remembrance. If the heart renounces the pleasures of the Dunya, it settles upon the [pursuance] of the pleasures of the Hereafter, and amongst those who call towards it. Should the heart become content with the pleasures of the Dunya, those pleasures [of the Hereafter] cease [to continue].

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Yearning for Allah and His meeting is like the gentle breeze blowing upon the heart, extinguishing the blaze of the Dunya. Whosoever caused his heart to settle with his Lord shall be in a state, calm and tranquil, and whosoever sent it amongst the people shall be disturbed and excessively perturbed.

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For the love of Allah shall not enter a heart which contains the love of this world, except as a camel which passes through the eye of a needle.

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Hence, the most beloved servant before Allah is the one whom He places in His servitude, whom He selects for His love, whom He causes to purify his worship for Him, dedicates his objectives for Him, his tongue for His remembrance, and his limbs for His service.

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The heart becomes sick, as the body becomes sick, and its remedy is al-Tawbah (repentance) and protection [from transgression]. It becomes rusty as a mirror becomes rusty, and its clarity is obtained by remembrance. It becomes naked as the body becomes naked, and its beautification is al-Taqwa. It becomes hungry and thirsty as the body becomes hungry, and its food and drink are knowledge, love, dependence, repentance and servitude.

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By: Imam Ibn ul Qayyim al Jawziyyah Source: www.islaam.com

Prostitution - behind the veil!

Assalamu alaykum

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Ok.. now its really bugging me that Muslim women claimed that they have rights, they are liberated, they are the ones that Islam has honoured them really is that really rue, is that projected from our action?... now I can hear some shocks and some eyebrows are sure to be raised after reading what I have just wrote. If you are a woman reading this, I ask you, when was the last time you truly defended YOUR RIGHT to wear hijab? And I don't just mean the line "Its the gift from Allah" or, "we are gems... we need to cover out beauty"... I mean from the heart, the words with meaning that tear jerking, heart wrenching pull on those who do not wear it, making them feel THEY are the ones at loss. I am sure you have been asked a thousand times... "WHY?!".. "Why, do you follow a religion that oppresses women", "Why do you HAVE to cover", and how many times have you been told "You're a woman, be proud!" "You're beautiful, be proud of your curves!!!"

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Sisters to you I tell you this.... wake up and look around you, we are being represented and misrepresented by anyone and anything that will spark controversy... you only have to turn to your 'well researched' Docu-dramas that are finding their ways onto main stream media. Just yesterday I was disgusted at a documentary on Channel 4, Prostitution - Behind the veil, naturally it had veil in the title so I was intrigued. But low and behold, what do I find a seemingly well founded, factual documentary depicting women, MUSLIM WOMEN as prostitues! Lahowlawala quwata! I felt sick and was in tears at what I saw...

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SYNOPSIS: CUTTING EDGE: PROSTITUTION BEHIND THE VEIL Directed by Nahid Persson, who fled from Iran 20 years ago, this documentary unveils the lives of two women, Minna and Fariba, who work as prostitutes in the Muslim society of Iran. Minna and Fariba are neighbours and good friends, who support each other. Both have to live with the widespread mistreatment of women and the double standards that permeate Iranian society today. Minna and Fariba both make a living from finding male customers on the streets. They have a choice between leaving their small children at home alone or taking them along when they have sex with various men. The film portrays the women sympathetically and explores their everyday life and the way prostitution functions in a country where it is banned and where adultery is persecuted, sometimes resulting in capital punishment. Many of the womens punters find a way to buy sex and still comply in Muslim law: they marry with the women in what is called Sighe, a temporary marriage legal in Shia Islam. Sighe can last from two hours up to 99 years. (From Denmark, in Farsi and Swedish, English subtitles)

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The documentary allowed two (Shia) Muslim Women in Iraq, selling their Izat, OUR IZAT for no more then $10... They were driven to do such a thing to feed their children, and their heroin addictions... They had no use for Islam, and little understanding... one of them at one point riped her tiny little scarf off exclaiming "damed veil".... Oh my dear sisters.. look at how your right to wear hijab is being portrayed in all its glory.

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Ok at first I just could not understand the audacity that these so called women could, would should do such things... things that I cannot repeat without going red with anger and shyness. But then I asked myself why am I getting angry at these women. As the documentary progressed it showed the reasons why these two women were heroin addicts, and guess what... guess who introduced them to the intoxicants... it was their husbands, the fathers of their innocent children.

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What has driven them to such extreme, it was the action of their protectors, their maintainers. As a result not only did the women blame their situation, but they also blamed the country, the fact that shariah law is forced upon them, indeed they were blaming Allah... Astagfarullah.</DIV>

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The documentary covered other issues such as quick marraiages, and having 'Sighe', which is apparently Halal (legal) in (Shia) Shariah law! It showed how one of the womens Sighe would beat her up and her baby, how a man can abuse women in the most horrendous way, how a man in his late 60s married a young runaway 17 year old girl, by a 'Imaam'</EM>! Their men are beyond words that he sold one of the womans daughter! What kind of man does that?! I felt sick! And we asked ourselves, why do people hate Islam so much!!

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Now their husbands were in jail, they were left to fend for themselves, what else does a woman have of worth... but herself, the one thing that man desire. They were in possession of a mighty powerful tool, and so they used it to their advantage. They sold themseleves. Look at them now.

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The children... they were not sensored, they would be witness to their mothers 'getting high' and probably inhaled some of the drug too, and worse still, the children would have to go on the streets with thier mothers, get in the car with total strangers, be witness to how much the price of their mothers honour is prices at, be witness to these fithy men talking fith to their mothers, what effect would this have on their small, innocent lives?

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So to you, the Muslim woman, I ask you, what are you doing to truly portray Islam, what are you doing to defend the honour of your sisters, how are we showing others the Haqq, how are we exemplifying the deen of Allah, what will we say in front of Allah, what will I say in front of my Lord, the most high.

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what are you doing... what are YOU doing, what are WE doing, what am I doing??

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food for thought this Ramadan

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wassalam </DIV>

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See sample of the documentary here share your thoughts on the film here http://www.dfi.dk/tidsskriftetfilm/39/prostitutionbehind.htm http://www.cbc.ca/passionateeye/behindtheveil.html

A letter from a Christian woman to all Muslim Sisters

Assalamu alaikum

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This letter from a Christian lady really made my day!

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A letter from a Christian woman to all Muslim Sisters

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Between the Israeli assault on Lebanon and the Zionist "war on terror," the Muslim world is now center stage in every American home. I see the carnage, death and destruction that have befallen Lebanon, but I also see something else: I see you. I can't help but notice that almost every woman I see is carrying a baby or has children around her. I see that though they are dressed modestly, their beauty still shines through. But it's not just outer beauty that I notice. I also notice that I feel something strange inside me: I feel envy. I feel terrible for the horrible experiences and war crimes that the Lebanese people have suffered, being targeted by our common enemy. But I can't help but admire your strength, your beauty, your modesty, and most of all, your happiness. Yes, it's strange, but it occurred to me that even under constant bombardment, you still seemed happier than we are, because you were still living the natural lives of women. The way women have always lived since the beginning of time. It used to be that way in the West until the 1960s, when we were bombarded by the same enemy. Only we were not bombarded with actual munitions, but with subtle trickery and moral corruption.

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They bombarded us Americans from Hollywood, instead of from fighter jets or with our own American-made tanks. They would like to bomb you in this way too, after they've finished bombing the infrastructure of your countries. I do not want this to happen to you. You will feel degraded, just like we do. You can avoid this kind of bombing if you will kindly listen to those of us who have already suffered serious casualties from their evil influence. Because everything you see coming out of Hollywood is a pack of lies, a distortion of reality, smoke and mirrors. They present casual sex as harmless recreation because they aim to destroy the moral fabric of the societies into which they beam their poisonous programming. I beg you not to drink their poison. There is no antidote for it once you have consumed it. You may recover partially, but you will never be the same. Better to avoid the poison altogether than to try to heal from the damage it causes. They will try to tempt you with their titillating movies and music videos, falsely portraying us American women as happy and satisfied, proud of dressing like prostitutes, and content without families. Most of us are not happy, trust me. Millions of us are on anti-depressant medication, hate our jobs, and cry at night over the men who told us they loved us, then greedily used us and walked away. They would like to destroy your families and convince you to have fewer children. They do this by presenting marriage as a form of slavery, motherhood as a curse, and being modest and pure as old-fashioned. They want you to cheapen yourself and lose your faith. They are like the Serpent tempting Eve with the apple. Don't bite.

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I see you as precious gems, pure gold, or the "pearl of great value" spoken of in the Bible (Matthew 13: 45). All women are pearls of great value, but some of us have been deceived into doubting the value of our purity. Jesus said: "Give not that which is holy unto the dogs, neither cast your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under their feet, and turn again and rend you" (Matthew 7: 6). Our pearls are priceless, but they convince us that they're cheap. But trust me; there is no substitute for being able to look in the mirror and seeing purity, innocence and self-respect staring back at you. The fashions coming out of the Western sewer are designed to make you believe that your most valuable asset is your sexuality. But your beautiful dresses and veils are actually sexier than any Western fashion, because they cloak you in mystery and show self-respect and confidence. A woman's sexuality should be guarded from unworthy eyes, since it should be your gift to the man who loves and respects you enough to marry you. And since your men are still manly warriors, they deserve no less than your best. Our men don't even want purity anymore. They don't recognize the pearl of great value, opting for the flashy rhinestone instead. Only to leave her too.

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Your most valuable assets are your inner beauty, your innocence, and everything that makes you who you are. But I notice that some Muslim women push the limit and try to be as Western as possible, even while wearing a veil (with some of their hair showing). Why imitate women who already regret, or will soon regret, their lost virtue? There is no compensation for that loss. You are flawless diamonds. Don't let them trick you into becoming rhinestones. Because everything you see in the fashion magazines and on Western television is a lie. It is Satan's trap. It is fool's gold.

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I'll let you in on a little secret, just in case you're curious: pre-marital sex is not even that great. We gave our bodies to the men we were in love with, believing that that was the way to make them love us and want to marry us. Just as we had seen on television growing up. But without the security of marriage and the sure knowledge that he will always stay with us, it's not even enjoyable! That's the irony. It was just a waste. It leaves you in tears.Speaking as one woman to another, I believe that you understand that already. Because only a woman can truly understand what's in another woman's heart. We really are all alike. Our race, religion or nationalities do not matter. A woman's heart is the same everywhere. We love. That's what we do best. We nurture our families and give comfort and strength to the men we love. But we American women have been fooled into believing that we are happiest having careers, our own homes in which to live alone, and freedom to give our love away to whomever we choose. That is not freedom. And that is not love. Only in the safe haven of marriage can a woman's body and heart be safe to love. Don't settle for anything less. It's not worth it. You won't even like it and you'll like yourself even less afterwards. Then he'll leave you.

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Sin never pays. It always cheats you. Even though I have reclaimed my honor, there's still no substitute for having never been dishonored in the first place. We Western women have been brainwashed into thinking that you Muslim women are oppressed. But truly, we are the ones who are oppressed; slaves to fashions that degrade us, obsessed with our weight, begging for love from men who do not want to grow up. Deep down inside, we know that we have been cheated. We secretly admire and envy you, although some of us will not admit it. Please do not look down on us or think that we like things the way they are. It's not our fault. Most of us did not have fathers to protect us when we were young because our families have been destroyed. You know who is behind this plot. Don't be fooled, my sisters. Don't let them get you too. Stay innocent and pure. We Christian women need to see what life is really supposed to be like for women. We need you to set the example for us, because we are lost. Hold onto your purity. Remember: you can't put the toothpaste back in the tube. So guard your "toothpaste" carefully!

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I hope you receive this advice in the spirit in which it is intended: the spirit of friendship, respect, and admiration.

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From your Christian sister - with love.

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(c) 2006+ Joanna Francis http://joannafrancis.wordpress.com All content copyright 2006+ by Mark Glenn, unless otherwise stated.

Seven Strategies to Train Kids this Ramadan

Assalamu alaykum wa rahmatuallah wa baraktu

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We ask Allaah the Most High, the All-Powerful, to teach us that which will benefit us, and to benefit us by that which we learn. May Allaah grant blessings and peace to our Prophet Muhammad and his family and companions.. Ameen

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Seven Strategies to Train Kids this Ramadan

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By: Shehnaz Toorawa

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Oct. 5, 2005

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The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said, "No father has given a greater gift to his children than good moral training." (Tirmidhi)

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The many aspects of Ramadan—fasting, prayers, moral values, charity, Qur'an, family, `Eid—provide a valuable opportunity to train kids. Whether they are your own kids or kids you teach, education or training isn't an automatic or easy process. Children don't bring empty minds and fill them with what we say. Training requires effort, energy, and a few techniques to take off.

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Here are some training tips and techniques to transform your children's minds and memories this Ramadan:

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(1) Let them get their Hands Dirty

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"The great aim of education is not knowledge, but action." Herbert Spencer

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hands-on activities compared to 5% through a lecture or 10% through reading (Brunmer, Jerome).

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If, for example, you want to teach your kids the concept of zakah, get them to help you calculate your zakah, decide where to send the money, and mail the envelopes. Action and implementation can occur while children learn, not necessarily after!

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The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) used to bring his grandchildren Hassan and Hussein to the mosque as toddlers before they knew how to pray.

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A concept becomes real and important to children when they experience it rather than simply read about it. They'll remember how to do it years later when you may catch them telling their friends "I've been calculating zakah since I was a kid!"

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(2) Involve their Emotions

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When children get emotionally involved in an activity, they rarely want to leave it. Video games and TV shows target children's emotions. As parents and educators, we can use the same technique for training.

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Stories, songs, skits, crafts, and games grab children's emotions. Once a child is interested and excited, they're more likely to stay attentive till the end and get the message you want to give. Just as we remember events in our lives that were emotionally significant, children remember concepts learned through activities that were "fun," "funny," "exciting," or "different."

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Don't be afraid to stir some fun into your training—you don't have to lose any content. Write a song about `Eid, create a Hadith treasure box, organize a Ramadan trivia night, or read a story about Ramadan in Madinah. If the kids enjoy it, they'll come back for more!

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(3) Reveal the Purpose

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We often hear students complain, "why do we have to do this?" or "this math exercise is pointless." Unfortunately, we often hear responses like "because I'm telling you to," or "because you have to," or worse, "you'll get a new CD player if you finish the book."

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Like us, if children don't see the purpose or importance of an action, they won't have the motivation to complete it. To avoid getting similar comments from your kids about prayer or fasting, make sure they understand the purpose. Before you begin any lesson, whether it's a story about the companions of the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) or an `Eid craft, explain exactly why you are the doing the activity and what benefits the children will gain from it.

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Remind your children that they are doing acts of worship to please Allah, not you. Explain why we need to please Allah and how every action, including washing dishes or math homework, will help us achieve that goal. If children are praying only to please you, when you leave, their motivation and prayers will disappear.

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If children are motivated to fast Ramadan or complete the Qur'an for a material incentive (like a CD player), they may never develop a love of Allah or an intrinsic desire to perform the action. They may, instead, learn to value material rewards and when the rewards disappear, the actions may disappear with them. Help your children understand that for Muslims, rewards don't necessarily always come in this life. They may have to wait for the bigger and better rewards of the hereafter.

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(4) Highlight the Big Ideas

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"Education is what remains after one has forgotten everything he learned in school." Albert Einstein

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Ask yourself how many equations or formulas you remember from your Grade 12 math textbook. It may be five, two, or none. Let's be honest—most of us retained very little of the details we learned.

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Children will not retain all the fiqh rulings of zakah, wudu', or Salah, and they won't need to! Make sure the little that they retain is exactly what you want them to remember. Focus on the big ideas, such as the awareness that Allah is watching us, that we get our rulings from the Qur'an and the Sunnah, that Prayer is a means of self-purification, etc. Repeat these ideas every day in different ways. While your children instil these principles in their minds, show them how to learn the rest on their own when they need it.

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Help your kids learn "how to learn." Teach them where to find the fiqh information they need or how to research a topic and who to ask for information. They will be better prepared if they master the basics and know how to get the specifics. Memorizing every ruling will be a waste of their time and yours.

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(5) Let them Lead!

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Children often take responsibilities more seriously than adults. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) appointed Usamah ibn Zaid who was a young boy at the time, as commander of the Muslim army although many older and more experienced companions were present. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) trusted Usamah's capability for the position.

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Give children leadership over important tasks and step out of the picture. Assign one child to wake up all his siblings for suhur. Let someone else be in charge of updating the iftar time every evening. Allow the children to plan, budget, and buy `Eid gifts for all the relatives. Let them choose which task they want to be in charge of.

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Allow children to make mistakes and realize on their own what they should have done. Experience often trains better than instruction. Once a child goes out into the cold without a jacket, he'll remember, before you can remind him, to put on his jacket next time.

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Train kids to be responsible for their own learning. If a child asks, "Does brushing teeth break my fast?" a simple "yes" or "no" may give them the answer, but it won't provide any long-term training. Ask them instead, "Where can you look to find that answer? Let's do some research." Begin the month of Ramadan by asking your children to do a research project on what breaks the fast and what does not. If they find the information themselves, they are likely to remember it and know exactly where to get it again next year.

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"The only person who is educated is the one who has learned how to learn and change." Carl Rogers

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(6) Get Excited!

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"Education is not the filling of a pail, but the lighting of a fire." W. B. Yeats

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Kids catch on to your enthusiasm. Show some excitement and passion about the topic you're teaching. Show your kids that you can't wait for Ramadan to begin. Be cheerful at Prayer times. Decorate the house in anticipation of `Eid.

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The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) taught by example. His character and actions motivated people to love and emulate him. Be the example you want your kids to be. Make a genuine effort to love the activities you want your kids to love.

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7) Combine Love with Learning

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The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) would greet children warmly by hugging them, kissing them and picking them up.

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Abu Huraira reported that al-Aqra' b. Habis saw the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) kissing Hasan. He said "I have ten children, but I have never kissed any one of them," whereupon Allah's Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him) said: He who does not show mercy (towards his children), no mercy would be shown to him. (Muslim)

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Show children that you love them, regardless of how they perform. Allow each child to progress at their own pace. Saying, "look at your cousin Aminah! She's already finished the 15th Juz," will only lower your child's self-esteem and discourage what she's already accomplishing.

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Excessive competition and comparison can often result in helplessness and lack of motivation for children who learn in different ways or at a slower pace. Allow children to judge their own progress and compare themselves to their former level rather than that of others.

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Make this Ramadan the beginning of a memorable and long-lasting training experience for you and your children!

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Sources: Bruner, Jerome S. The Process of Education. Cambridge, Mass: Harvard University Press, 1977. Shehnaz Toorawa holds a degree in Education from the University of Toronto and a diploma in Islamic Studies from the American Open University